February 11th, 2016

(no subject)

A friend has died. Another friend, I must say, for there have been too many deaths this year. Today I want to remember Salmah, though, for today i realised that we'll never have that meet-up we planned.

Some friends don't need to be in my life everyday. I keep in touch with them and whenever we catch up, there is no feeling of time lapse. The problem with this is that I assume that I will get my trip or she'll get her trip and that we'll have that conversation. Salmah will make me her amazing noodles and I'll teach her another cake recipe. She won't be wearing jeans anymore, because the last picture of her I saw she was very elegant and dignified, but I will always think of her in jeans, for she wore them with aplomb and argued with anyone who told her that Muslim women had to be more modest. She would explain the differences in different parts of the Muslim world to them and she would explain where she came from and she and I would make a unity of modern people who nevertheless maintained their religion. There were always people who'd argue with one of us and tell us what we ought to be. She's one of the friends who taught me that I didn't have to do what the idiots thought. That it's possible to be strong, independent, modern and still follow one's own customs.

There are some people whose loss echoes around the world. Salmah is one of these people. She didn't waste a second of her existence, but it was cut far too short. And we were both too patient about that meet-up. We promised it to each other thirty years ago.